Days 19-28. Hush.


I took a break from everything after having so many mind-boggling things affect my judgement and peace.

I’d have to say, I’m still a little lost, it’s almost a month, yet I still don’t know how to feel as right as rain.

I’m grateful for my job, friends and Jess for being the only things I could count on. I know that somehow, I still can’t handle the thought and feeling of being alone. I would of course admit that not feeling his half added to my half, feels off-balanced in some sort of weird way.

This post awfully sounds so sad, and melancholy. I can’t lie. I haven’t had a thought of what to write, or what to actually think. I continuously push all of those thoughts out of my mind as it doesn’t help me at all in this journey. It gets so hard though sometimes, I just miss him so much.

I procrastinate on how it’s so easy for him to actually go through this but then again, I know him. I know it’s not easy for him, Mr.-I-think-too-much-and-have-to-critically-analyze-everything, and what sucks is I know that he still loves me. It’s just the awful truth that’s pushing us away from each other.

When we were young, we would wish that life was so much more complicated. Now that I’m considered as an adult, I wish that love was so easy and simple, not like this wherein you have to take a risk and gamble for everything.

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